Friday Funnies!

You absolutely MUST read the whole thing, I laughed so hard I think I pee'd a little.

H/T: Crush Liberalism and our friend Mr. Leffingwell

The following is a transcript of the meeting at which Abu Mussab al-Zarqawi was whacked.

Zarqawi : Ahmed! Salam aleichem. So good to see you. (kiss, kiss) How hangs the hammer?

Ahmed : Aleichem salam, Abu. The hammer hangs a little to the left. I bought these new underwear. You know how I hate sand in my crack.. I thought I would try briefs, but they really ride up, you know? It’s like they are crushing my goodies…

Zarqawi : It’s just an expression, Ahmed. I really don’t want to know about the hanging of your hammer.

Ahmed : So sorry. It’s just these briefs, they’re really getting me down…

(fast forward)
Qadif: Oh, blessed leader, you will be so pleased. American resolve is fading faster than K-Fed’s hair.

Zarqawi: And our infidel collaborators?

Qadif: The New York times has been especially helpful. They are still using the word “quagmire” regularly and keep Haditha on the front page every day. They are dutifully blaming the car bombings and IEDs on the president. It is thing of beauty! CNN spends half their time driving down administration poll numbers and the other half harping on how low they are. Then there is the infidel Murtha. While I do not wish to downplay the great work done by infidels Kennedy and Kerry, Murtha has really gone out of his way to help break the will of the American people.

Zarqawi: Excellent!... what’s that smell?
(silence)
Zarqawi: Alright, enough with the bean dip! Oh, that’s right, Ali, giggle like a girl. Bad enough you smell like a Persian whore that has rolled in the dead fish section of a landfill in July, now you have to add bean gas. You are a disgrace.